The Edmond Sun

Features

February 1, 2013

Most boys OK with not being ‘equal’ to girls

CNHI News Service — Q: Our two sons are in the fifth and sixth grades at a private school that just held a father-daughter dance. Now the school has announced that it’s putting on a mother-son dance so as not to leave out the boys. I really don’t want to attend this. It’s just not my thing. One of our boys says he doesn’t really want to go. The other one says he’d like to go but doesn’t mind if I don’t want to. What are your thoughts?

A: This sounds like so much politically correct silliness to me. Boys, generally speaking, don’t want to be “equal” to girls. They’re perfectly content with girls receiving certain privileges they don’t receive and enjoying certain girls-only activities. This continues into adulthood, where one finds that men don’t mind women having social clubs and business organizations that are gender-exclusive.

I think a mother-son dance is benign (albeit the school’s reason for putting it on is), but if you don’t want to participate, then don’t. If your boys had strong feelings about attending, and most of their friends were going to be there, I’d recommend that you grin and bear it. Be prepared, however, for the boys to all want to get together on one side of the room and talk about boy stuff.

As an alternative, consider creating your own mother-son experience. Take your boys out to a nice restaurant and teach them proper etiquette, for example. I’m sure you’ve noticed that the world is sorely lacking in young men who know to pull out chairs and open doors for women.

Q: Our 9-year-old (only child) is home-schooled. He starts out well for about one hour, but then the wheels start falling off. He has to constantly be told what to do, but if you don’t stand over him, it doesn’t get done. My wife is tired of trying to teach a child that seems unwilling to be taught. We can take all of his things away from him and it doesn’t bother him. Suggestions?

A: I am a home-school proponent, but I’m also a realist. Home-schooling is not a one-size-fits-all educational option. Some children accept the responsibility well; others, like your son, do not.

I’ve said many times in this column that parents should not home-school a child with whom they are having significant discipline issues. Needless to say, oppositional behavior in the home-school context is highly counterproductive. Behavior problems need to be resolved before home-schooling is undertaken.

The other problem here may be that your wife is using a curriculum that requires too much involvement on her part. Micro-management works no better in a home-school than in any other situation. That quicksand can be avoided by getting plugged into a home-school cooperative where teaching responsibilities are shared among several moms and the children are taught in a small group.

Your local or state home-school coordinator can help you find a suitable home-school group as well as, if need be, a more functional set of educational materials.

FAMILY psychologist John Rosemond answers parents’ questions on his website at www.rosemond.com.

1
Text Only
Features
  • Preparing for a fall home garden

    Gardening can be a year-around activity for those that have an appreciation for fresh and nutritious vegetables. Some of the best vegetables in Oklahoma are produced and harvested during the cooler weather of fall. Successful fall gardens, however, require some work in the summer growing season. Factors to be considered are location, soil preparation, crops to be grown and how/when to plant.  
    The major consideration for garden placement is sunlight. All vegetables require some sunlight; the most popular vegetables require full sun. “Full” sun means at least 8 hours of intense, direct exposure.

    July 24, 2014

  • Fall gardening season has arrived

    Even though the temperature is hot and there are still summer vacations on the calendar, it is time to start thinking about planting your fall garden.
    Most Oklahoma gardeners are still reaping the rewards of their spring gardens, said David Hillock, Oklahoma State University Cooperative Extension consumer horticulturist, but it is not too early to plan for fall gardening crops.

    July 23, 2014

  • Receive 10 free dogwood trees from Arbor Day Foundation

    Add color to your landscape year-round by joining the Arbor Day Foundation in August.

    July 23, 2014

  • Authorities update Simpson’s saga

    Investigators are attempting to locate the owner of a dog named Simpson to determine whether or not his injuries were due to an accident or man-made, an official said.
    On July 1, the Logan County Sheriff’s Office investigated reports of an injured dog near the intersection of Western and Simpson in south Logan County, Lt. Tom Kutay said. Officers responded and took several statements of a dog being found with injures to its back, Kutay said.

    July 22, 2014

  • Whataburger celebrates children’s superhero spirit with ‘Super-Duper’ event

    It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s a Super Duper Celebration! In the heart of every child lives a superhero and on Thursday Whataburger restaurants will celebrate the superhero spirit in all of us with an evening of family fun from 5-7 p.m. at its location at 421 S. Broadway.
    Customers can spend quality time with their little heroes and treat them to a superhero-themed celebration of food, activities and giveaways. Children 12 and under dressed in a superhero costume will receive a free kid’s meal. There will be a Whataburger photo booth and Whataburger’s mascot, Whataguy, will also be present to join the fun.

    July 22, 2014

  • Shopping smarter for family necessities can help the environment

    There’s a growing trend among consumers to make choices reflecting the goals and values that matter to them most.  In fact, two out of five people say they’re more inspired to try a natural product that does something good for themselves, their family and the planet, according to a recent study conducted by Toluna for natural products brand Tom’s of Maine.

    July 21, 2014

  • Back to school lunch Build a better bag

    Brown bag lunches and back to school go hand in hand. As you’re gearing up for the start of a new school year, it’s the perfect time to stock the pantry with healthy sack lunch options and after school snacks, too.

    July 21, 2014 1 Photo

  • Pets

    This is a list of animals that have been found and are at the Edmond Animal Shelter, at Interstate 35 and Covell in the Cross Timbers Municipal Complex. Call the shelter at 216-7615 for more information.

    July 21, 2014

  • Kids Cook Simple ways canned foods get children cooking

    When it comes to teaching children about healthy eating habits, there’s no better classroom than the kitchen.

    July 21, 2014 1 Photo

  • Garden Vegetable Spring Rolls The Canebrake offers summer recipe for Garden Vegetable Spring Rolls

    The Canebrake, a destination hotel and spa in Wagoner, is offering the following recipe from its restaurant for Garden Vegetable Spring Rolls with Avocado Wasabi Puree.

    July 21, 2014 1 Photo